I Am the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: An Interview.

The Austrian Oak is universally recognized as an Hollywood heavyweight. But, in the midst of his blockbuster fame in the late 20th century, he also delivered several surprisingly great comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35-year mark this winter.

The Story and The Famous Scene

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger plays a hardened detective who goes undercover as a elementary educator to catch a killer. During the film's runtime, the crime storyline functions as a loose framework for the star to film humorous scenes with children. The most unforgettable involves a child named Joseph, who out of nowhere announces and states the actor, “Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.” Schwarzenegger responds dryly, “Thank you for that information.”

That iconic child was brought to life by child star Miko Hughes. His career encompassed a notable part on Full House as the bully to the Olsen twins and the character of the resurrected boy in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with multiple films in development. Furthermore, he frequently attends popular culture events. Recently recalled his experiences from the set of Kindergarten Cop over three decades on.

Behind the Scenes

Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the youngest of all the kids on set.

Wow, I have no memory from being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, somewhat. They're snapshots. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would accompany me to auditions. Frequently it was a mass tryout. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all just have to wait, go into the room, be in there less than five minutes, do whatever little line they wanted and that was it. My parents would help me learn the words and then, once I learned to read, that was probably the first stuff I was reading.

Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your impression of him?

He was incredibly nice. He was fun. He was nice, which I guess makes sense. It would be strange if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that surely wouldn't foster a good work environment. He was great to work with.

“It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I understood he was a huge celebrity because I was told, but I had never really seen his movies. I felt the importance — he was a big deal — but he wasn't scary to me. He was simply playful and I only wanted to hang out with him when he wasn't busy. He was occupied, of course, but he'd sometimes engage here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd show his strength and we'd be dangling there. He was really, really generous. He bought every kid in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was the hottest tech. This was the hottest tech out there, that funky old yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It wore out in time. I also was given a genuine metal whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your days on set as being fun?

You know, it's funny, that movie became a phenomenon. It was a huge film, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a selective diner at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was brand new. That was the coolest toy, and I was pretty good at it. I was the smallest kid and some of the bigger kids would ask for my help to beat difficult stages on games because I knew how, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

The Infamous Moment

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember how it happened? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word provocative meant, but I knew it was provocative and it caused the crew to chuckle. I was aware it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given special permission in this case because it was funny.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it was conceived, based on what I was told, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. Some character lines were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, I suppose the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to deliver this dialogue. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "I need to consider this, I need time" and took some time. It was a tough call for her. She said she was hesitant, but she believed it could end up as one of the iconic quotes from the movie and she was right.